Following on from the recent so-called “Crib Gate” scandal, which saw a pub crib board mysteriously singed by a frustrated punter, we now have the “Cig Gate” scandal.
Word at the Dawlish Whispers HQ tells us that an irksome punter in one of the local hostelries borrowed a lighter from a fellow drinker. Taking their drink with them with the intention of moving on after finishing their cancer stick, it seemed prudent to quickly light the cigarette and return the lighter to it’s rightful owner to avoid forgetting to return it when the inhalations were complete.
Having done this, and exited the premises within a matter of seconds, they were subsequently followed to the smoking area by the bar person (who must of course remain nameless), and severely reprimanded for this act of gross misconduct.
Meanwhile at the bar, an incarnation of a benzedrine puff adder is spewing poison of a racist and bigoted nature, no doubt repeated directly from the pages of the Daily (Hate) Mail, which is of course the newspaper of choice in the town.
Well, call me pedantic and childish if you will, but to my mind a brief smell of cigarette smoke is far less offensive than having to listen to the rantings of aforementioned snake.
Just saying like …………..